The Sun Shines On And On
by Interstella
Summary: The sun shines on even when it's hidden by clouds. I know htat, but why do I feel that my sun has dies? Really, it was me who went away. Goku's POV, previously on my other account. GokuSanzo.-COMPLETE


The sun shines on

Once upon a time, there was a monkey king. He loved his master very much, but one day, things went wrong. This is his story.

The sun shines on, even should it be hidden by clouds. It still shines on, even through the night when hidden by the rotation of the planet. I know this, Hakkai told it all to me. I understand that the sun doesn't rise or set and I understand that it's always shining. But now I think to myself when I'm sitting alone it the room that Sanzo and I once shared. I think to myself, if the sun never stops shining, then why can I no longer feel it's heat?

I remember the day I lost him. I say I lost him, because I haven't seen him since. I suppose I didn't really loose him, concidering that it was me that went away. I guess he just lost me. Anyway, I still remember that it was raining. The heavens had been threatening to open up for days and we (ie Sanzo) had decided that we couldn't stay cooped up waiting for the rain to pass. We decided instead, to continue traveling. It was only after we had been out of sight of the town that it started to rain. We (ie me and Hakkai) built shelter.

We sat there for several hours to wait out the rain. Hakkai made some food and I ate most of it. Then we played Majhong. Hakkai let Gojyo win. I still think there's something going on between those two. But anyway, after we played several games, we went to bed. This is when things started to go bad.

"No! I don' wanna!" I yelled at Sanzo.

"I didn't ask if you wanted to, I told you to do it. So do it!"

"No. I won't. You do it." I was fed up of him always ordering me around. Dead sick of it. So I decided it was high time I stuck up for myself. Sanzo tried to intimidate me by shooting in my general direction. It didn't work. I knew him well enough to know that he wouldn't shoot me. I didn't so much as flinch. I just turned my back and lay on the floor, covering myself with a blanket.

"Goku, go get the fire wood!" Sanzo said in a deadly voice.

"No." I said again. "I told you, I don't want to. You do it."

"Wha-?"

"Goku, please could you get us some fire wood?" Hakkai was so polite. At least he acctually asked me to do things rather than ordering me to do it like Sanzo does. I nodded and went to get the firewood. Truth be told, I was getting kinda cold myself. I returned to see Sanzo pointing his gun at Hakkai.

"What the hell!?" I yelled, trying to defuse the situation. "Sanzo? What the hell are you doing!?"

"But out of it Goku. Keep out of other people's buisness." He growled at me. I growled back.

"No. You tell me why you're pointing that thing at Hakkai! I won't let you shoot my friend!"

"You don't understand."

"No, I don't. And I never will, unless you start to explain things to me." As I was talking, I edged closer to the pair. I could see that Gojyo was already lying on the floor, clutching a bleeding arm. Even if Sanzo did shoot them, he wouldn't shoot me... right? Wrong. As I edged closer to Sanzo, he noticed and turned his gun on me. This allowed Hakkai to escape, as for Sanzo... I don't know what made him do it. It took all of a second for me to fall to the floor. The bullet had gone straight through my stomach. My eyes felt heavy as I looked to the spreading blood on my clothes. He had shot me. With a banashing gun.

That was my last thought before my body disintergrated...

Now, it doesn't take a genious to figure out that I'm writing this, so I can't have died... well, if you agreed with that, then... you're wrong. Hah! Bechya weren't expecting that! Well, I did die. I spent several earth days living in Shangri-la watching Sanzo and the others continue the journey without me. It hurt more than a little to find out that they weren't even mad at Sanzo.

The merciful goddess wouldn't let me know why he did it, and she got so sick of my asking that she sent me back to earth with instructions to 'not die' again until I was at least not hungry anymore.

Well, when she sent me back, she sent me to the same place as the last time I was cast out of heaven, the cave. As soon as my feet came in contact with the ground, I ran. I ran and ran as fast as I could go. I didn't know where I was heading until I found myself at Chang'an. Officially I was still under Sanzo's care, so they had to take me in. They were even so kind as to give me the same room as I had when I was living there last.

That was seven years ago, and I've just gotten word that the Sanzo-party are to return today or tomorrow. I am more than a little apprehensive. They've thought of me as dead for the past seven years. I wonder how they'll react to finding me alive and waiting for them. And I wonder if Sanzo will explain why he killed me.

I woke to find the sun had already risen. I got dressed and left my room. There was nobody around, which was weird. There was _always_ some one around. I soon figured out where everyone was when I heard the familiar gun being shot and the usual growl that followed it.

"Get the hell away from me!" Sanzo was home!

A crowd of monks ran past me hurrying for cover. I let them run past and continued towards Sanzo. I stood at the end of the corridor and looked at them. They all looked the same, except for the fact they seemed older, and shorter.

Hakkai noticed me first. "Oh my." He said staring at me. "Could it really be?" I grinned at him. "But, it's impossible. How are you alive?" By this time, Gojyo was looking at Hakkai.

"I don't know." I told him with a shrug. "Ask the merciful goddess, she sent me back."

Sanzo looked at me and paled. "Goku? Is it really you?"

"Yep."

Sanzo looked at me, then, he fainted.

Gojyo looked at his fallen comrade with a smirk then turned to me. "So monkey, you like scaring him half to death?"

I acted as if I really didn't care. "He killed me. If I kill him, we'll be even."

"You don't know the circumstances surrounding your death do you?" Hakkai asked me, scooping Sanzo off the floor and handed him to Gojyo. "Take him to his room. I'll explain to Goku." Gojyo smirked and walked away.

"Goku, you don't understand. You don't have all the facts."

"I'm sick of people telling me that. I understand perfectly. Sanzo shot me with a banishing gun. Then I died." I shrugged. "I don't need any other facts."

"Sanzo didn't kill you."

"Coulda fooled me." I responded tartly.

"He was possessed. By a leach demon."

"Leach demon?"

"A demon that feeds on despair. It latches on to its victim and makes it do what would hurt them most. Not physically, but emotionally. When Sanzo sent you to get the firewood, it was to protect you. He could feel it taking over and he didn't want to hurt you. You see that was what would cause him the most pain." That sounded really stupid. But it was Hakkai that was telling me, so it must have been true.

"And what of this leach demon now?"

Hakkai smiled. "It got an overdose."

"It died because Sanzo was sad because that thing made him kill me?"

"Yes. But Goku," He said, looking me in the eye. "Neither me nor Gojyo blame him, but he does. He took it real hard. Be gentle." I nodded as I headed to Sanzo's room.

When I got there, Sanzo was sat up in bed, looking out the window. "They cut down the tree." I told him. He turned to look at me.

"Goku? Is it really you? But how?" His voice sounded weak.

"The goddess got annoyed with me. She sent me back. I was back at the mountain and I ran. I ended up here. I knew that I wouldn't be able to catch up with you, so I waited here." I shrugged and sat down.

"I'm sorry." He said. "For killing you."

"Hakkai explained it to me." I grinned at him. "I understand."

"So you don't blame me?"

"Course I do. But not for what you think. I blame you for not telling me the truth, for telling me that I wouldn't understand. I'm not a kid. I'm older than you and I can understand more than you think. 'Specially now that I remember the past."

"You do?"

"Yeah. I should thank you for that. I wouldn't have been able to remember if you didn't send me to Shangri-la. I can remember your past form. That's why Homura calls you Konzen, because back then, that was your name. And you" I pointed at Gojyo "were Kenren. And Hakkai was Kenren's boyfriend Tenpou."

"Boyfriend?"

"Yup." Internally, I smiled. It wasn't everyday that you got to tell a womanizer that he used to be gay.

"Makes sense." He said.

"Huh?" I asked.

Any explination that Gojyo would've given me was interrupted by Sanzo. "Goku, can you ever forgive me? For killing you, I mean."

"It wasn't really your fault." I shrugged. "I don't see what there is to forgive."

Sanzo stared at me for a few seconds. "You've changed." He said.

"That's what happens after seven years." I pointed out. "It's a long time. A long time to wait."

"You waited for me?"

"Yeah," Well what else was I supposed to do? My whole life I had been around this man, not counting the five hundred years of isolation. All my life I had been with either him or his past life, what exactly could I do without him?

Sanzo looked at me, his purple eyes shining with unshed tears. "Thank you." He whispered. "I think now I can finally forgive myself."

I walked to him. Standing beside his bed, I reached down and took his chin in my fingertips. "But first, forgive me, for what I'm about to do." After speaking those words, I tilted his chin up and placed my lips against his. I pulled back before long and was surprised to see he had closed his eyes. He blinked them open and looked at me.

"I don't see what there is to forgive," He repeated my earlier words.

"Gygh." This odd sound came from Gojyo. "That's disgusting,"

"That never stopped you and Hakkai." Sanzo said pulling a face.

I laughed at the expression on his face. "So you don't mind me doing that?" I asked hopefully. Sanzo shook his head.

"But do it in a public place, and I'll kill you." I smiled broadly. This was the Sanzo I remembered.

And so, our new life began. We stayed at Chang'an for several years before finally moving to the nearby town. We never had any kids, for obvious reasons, but other than that, we lived happily ever after…

A/N This was previously on my other account, but more people read these ones and I was hoping for a few more reviews. I feel lonely when no one reviews… please review… and If anyone wants to do a saiyuki roleplay with me, say so in a review!!


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